Sex+Sexual Abuse: Sister of a Survivor-Anonymous (Female)

This was a story sent into me. To send your story, email me at stargee@me.com

I want to tell you my sister's story about being sexually abused.

She's only 13 and I love her with all my heart. She just recently told me about being sexually abused by my step mother's ex boyfriend/drug dealer. This happened from the time she was 5-8 on a daily basis. My step mother was an addict, not sure what she used, but she has been clean for 5 years now.

It broke my heart when my little sister told me that this happened to her, it still does to this day when I think about it. We were talkin about me and my sex life one night because I am trying to teach her the right things to do when she is faced with the peer pressures of having sex and she broke down in my arms crying and told me how every night when my step mom was passed out he would make her do horrible things and she did them because he threatened to hurt her and my mom.

So she did whatever he told her do because she loves her mom, even though she was not a good mother at the time. I try to get her to talk to me about everything because she had held so much in for so long because she didnt have anyone that cared about her around her due to moms drug problem. She is still scared to this day to tell our mom because she has nightmares about the guy and how he threatened her he was gonna kill our mom if she told anyone. The night she told me it took so much for her to even say it but I knew even before she opened her mouth that it had happened because I could see the guilt, shame and embarrassment in her eyes. I told her it wasn't her fault but she still feels to blame for this even to this day.

She is still tryin to heal from this but the memories haunt her every time she shuts her eyes which has caused her to have insomnia. I try to help her as much as possible but I'm not sure what I can do. I want to tell our mom but I know that's not my place to do so. I just feel guilty for it too even though when it happened we weren't a family and we didnt know about each other.